[the moment when you struggle to come up with anything seriously negative]
Yes, I have been brainwashed. Used to read blogs by chicken-fanciers, thinking surely chickens are not that great. They are after all mostly beak and claw, a bit ugly, messy and noisy (there you go, some cons for you). But they are also so much more than that.
Ours are not pets - they have their large run in the garden, and in the winter, they get full access to the whole garden to fertilize and loosen the soil, and to get rid of creepy crawlies, but they live in their space, and and we in ours. They can be handled, provided you can catch them, but they are disinclined to sit on your lap. The only time they like being close to humans is if you have a spade or fork in your hand, and are doing some vigorous digging. Sitting on the spade, sticking their heads through the fork tines, always ready to catch any worm or bug that gets dug up. Scratching on the earth heaps afterwards is apparently the best thing ever.
Now to the list. In favour of chicken-keeping
- Well fertilised and tilthed earth. Eats, poos, scratches - good soil for the following season.
- Low-maintenance to look after. Feed them regularly and check they are ok, clean them out, and that is pretty much it.
- Guilt-free leftovers. They are not particularly picky eaters (I mean, they love slugs), so they get leftover fruit and veg, peels, apple cores, any odds and ends, a bit of rice or pasta on occasion, cheese and yoghurt scrapings, cottage cheese, watermelon rinds to finish off, what is left after making tomato passata etc. And then they turn it into eggs!
- A definite health benefit through destressing by watching chickens go about their business, contentedly plocking to themselves, taking dust baths, pecking at random things.
- Immense enjoyment from looking after some rather strange creatures. After all, they are basically dinosaurs. Ours get a lot of exercise, as they always run towards us when we go into the garden (which is frequently), in the hope of grain or fruity treats. It is quite a sight to have feathery cannonballs charging towards you beak-first. Their claws look scary, too. Hardy the cat shows a lot of respect, with good reason! However, I was most surprised to find out that their feet are actually very soft and gentle. They feel more like hands, in fact, when they grip on to your fingers. Freaky.... but kind of cute as well.
They may not have brains as such (once brain cell does not count, and it is not always actively used), but they have personalities and preferences. They play rugby with bits of cheese, hop for food that is tied over their heads, and twice per day do things together. Joint drinking or grooming sessions are a lovely display. A flock of chickens doing the same thing together, in harmony for a short period of time, before going back to pecking order and flock mentality. Some are bolshy, some are more timid. Pickwick is a haughty little madam, Johnny is a matron. Sid is a beauty and knows it, proudly strutting around with her head and vibrant comb held high. Pock is the crazy old grandmother. If she was a person, she would wear huge glasses, lipstick and red dyed hair, cackling madly on her front porch with a glass of gin in her hand.
Cons of chicken keeping
- THE NOISE. Specifically, THE NOISE early in the morning. In the summer, they start shouting at 430am. Egg, egg, egg, egg, EGG, EGG, EGG, egg, egg. On repeat. In the autumn and winter, it is more like 530am, 615am or 630am. There is no rule or regularity. No way to tune out the shouting. No earplugs are strong enough. Strangely, no complaints from the neighbours yet... and really, I meant to get up that early anyway.
I call it my chicken alarm clock. Now make your own!
https://soundcloud.com/nat-merry/chicken-oclock
Yes, I have been brainwashed. Used to read blogs by chicken-fanciers, thinking surely chickens are not that great. They are after all mostly beak and claw, a bit ugly, messy and noisy (there you go, some cons for you). But they are also so much more than that.
Ours are not pets - they have their large run in the garden, and in the winter, they get full access to the whole garden to fertilize and loosen the soil, and to get rid of creepy crawlies, but they live in their space, and and we in ours. They can be handled, provided you can catch them, but they are disinclined to sit on your lap. The only time they like being close to humans is if you have a spade or fork in your hand, and are doing some vigorous digging. Sitting on the spade, sticking their heads through the fork tines, always ready to catch any worm or bug that gets dug up. Scratching on the earth heaps afterwards is apparently the best thing ever.
Now to the list. In favour of chicken-keeping
- Egg, egg, egg, egg, EGG, EGG, EGG, egg, egg (more anon). Nothing compares to home-laid eggs. They are a rich orange colour, creamy, flavourful, and of course, oh so fresh. I can no longer eat poached or fried eggs in cafés, as they tend to be an abomination by comparison.
- No pests in the garden to eat your vegetables. Our chickens have done a great job over the winter to remove all bugs, slugs, ants and critters that might eat veggies in the summer. We have no need for artificial pest-removers, keeping our garden nicely organic.- Well fertilised and tilthed earth. Eats, poos, scratches - good soil for the following season.
- Low-maintenance to look after. Feed them regularly and check they are ok, clean them out, and that is pretty much it.
- Guilt-free leftovers. They are not particularly picky eaters (I mean, they love slugs), so they get leftover fruit and veg, peels, apple cores, any odds and ends, a bit of rice or pasta on occasion, cheese and yoghurt scrapings, cottage cheese, watermelon rinds to finish off, what is left after making tomato passata etc. And then they turn it into eggs!
- A definite health benefit through destressing by watching chickens go about their business, contentedly plocking to themselves, taking dust baths, pecking at random things.
- Immense enjoyment from looking after some rather strange creatures. After all, they are basically dinosaurs. Ours get a lot of exercise, as they always run towards us when we go into the garden (which is frequently), in the hope of grain or fruity treats. It is quite a sight to have feathery cannonballs charging towards you beak-first. Their claws look scary, too. Hardy the cat shows a lot of respect, with good reason! However, I was most surprised to find out that their feet are actually very soft and gentle. They feel more like hands, in fact, when they grip on to your fingers. Freaky.... but kind of cute as well.
They may not have brains as such (once brain cell does not count, and it is not always actively used), but they have personalities and preferences. They play rugby with bits of cheese, hop for food that is tied over their heads, and twice per day do things together. Joint drinking or grooming sessions are a lovely display. A flock of chickens doing the same thing together, in harmony for a short period of time, before going back to pecking order and flock mentality. Some are bolshy, some are more timid. Pickwick is a haughty little madam, Johnny is a matron. Sid is a beauty and knows it, proudly strutting around with her head and vibrant comb held high. Pock is the crazy old grandmother. If she was a person, she would wear huge glasses, lipstick and red dyed hair, cackling madly on her front porch with a glass of gin in her hand.
 |
| Pock, the Dame Edna Everage of chickens |
 |
| Plink plink I flutter my non-existent eyelashes at you. Sid at her best angle. |
 |
| Pickwick clearly disapproves. She is also a bit unwell, the poor thing, but is hiding it well. |
 |
| Johnny makes sure everybody goes to bed on time. Also looks slightly short-sighted with her comb-over. |
Cons of chicken keeping
- THE NOISE. Specifically, THE NOISE early in the morning. In the summer, they start shouting at 430am. Egg, egg, egg, egg, EGG, EGG, EGG, egg, egg. On repeat. In the autumn and winter, it is more like 530am, 615am or 630am. There is no rule or regularity. No way to tune out the shouting. No earplugs are strong enough. Strangely, no complaints from the neighbours yet... and really, I meant to get up that early anyway.
I call it my chicken alarm clock. Now make your own!
https://soundcloud.com/nat-merry/chicken-oclock
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